This is Not My Beautiful House

Jack (names have been changed to protect the "innocent") picked me up at Raleigh/Durham International Airport a little less than a year ago. May 10, 2008 to be exact. Little did I know at the time that nine months later I would actually still be living and working in "The City of Oaks". That's Raleigh, to all of you Yankees and others who hail from different lands. Also, little did I know how much change would occur in my life because of this portentous day. You may ask, "Who is this Jack character?" Well, simply put, Jack is a dear friend of mine, and the catalyst (well, one of them) for me moving to Raleigh, NC. If it wasn't for Jack and my other friend, "Alex" who lives in Concord (he is definitely not an Alex, but...), I never in a million years would have considered Raleigh as a place to hang my hat. I mean who moves to Raleigh? I guess the real question should be, who up and leaves ten years of her life in New York City behind for a place where she barely knows a soul and doesn't have a job or a place to live? Seeing as I'm writing this to get my story out on paper (or computer screen, as the case may be) as opposed to therapeutic purposes, I'll leave that question alone for the time being. It is a good question, though, but back to Jack.

Jack and I worked together on the road for what was originally intended to be a five month Kenny Chesney tour, which was then pared (at least for Jack and I) down to two months. We lived, ate, worked and slept in close proximity to one another for this entire time, all on a rickety old RV with a mobile kitchen trailer hitched to the back. This also was all accomplished with four other guys (who shall remain nameless) and a bus driver from Winston-Salem named Joe. There's definitely a few stories in there with these particular five people, but I'll save that for another time.

When my original plans went awry on this particular tour, one of the first people I called was Jack. He had left the tour a mere three days before I did, and in a very dramatic way. Because of this, and for other reasons, he seemed like the most logical person to talk to. I'm not sure why, it just was that way. The way that I guess I was viewing it is that Jack was the only person that would understand why I was leaving the tour, and understand he did. He heard my story and immediately suggested that I come down to Raleigh to visit for a week or two while I considered my next steps. I had of course given up my apartment in Brooklyn thinking that I would be on the road for five months, so my options were limited as to where I could go. There were other options, of course, but, as crazy as it sounds, suddenly going somewhere that wasn't familiar to me seemed like a good idea.

He cleared it with Janet, his "live-in girlfriend" with whom I had worked on a previous date during my first trip to Raleigh back in March. Ah yes. Good ol' Barry Manilow brought us all together for the first time. Thanks, Barry. Unfortunately, in Jack's eyes, Janet was his "live-in girlfriend" but in Janet's eyes, Jack was a meal ticket. This was more than apparent to all of his friends, but unfortunately, once again, Jack turned a blind eye. Ah, love.

I didn't really care for Janet much when I first met her. I got the impression that she was completely manipulative, a quality which I abhor in both women and men alike. Regardless of how I felt about Janet, I took Jack up on his offer to stay at his house, made my way to the Baltimore airport, and jumped on the next plane to Raleigh. I can turn a blind eye as well, I guess.

Janet was actually driving and Jack was in the passenger seat when they pulled up to the passenger pick-up area. Why was this? Well, the thing about Jack was that he's an alcoholic, pure and simple, and an alcoholic of the most severe variety. When he drinks, there's usually no stopping, and at that point he had been on a bender for four consecutive days. He would wake up to a beer, wine or another alcoholic beverage, continuing until he was a belligerent, drooling fool. This is not to pass judgment on my friend, it's merely stating a fact. I'm completely aware that we've all, including myself, have been drunk in ridiculous ways before, but Jack took it to the next level. You see, the thing that I noticed first about Jack was that his hands were always shaking. Well actually that was after I noticed his dry and acerbic wit. Jack, the man with shaking hands and a caustic sense of humor. What would there not be to like? There was mention of medication that he had to pick up while we were on tour, so at first I thought the shaking may have been some sort of neurological disorder like Parkinson's disease. When I decided that I have ability to diagnose these sorts of things, I'm not sure, but it's probably something that I should refrain from. What really was going on was that Jack, when on the road would completely abstain from his usual boozing ways, which, I guess, was part of his contract with the company that shall remain nameless. Because of his abstinence, he would inevitably end up with a terrible case of the D.T.s which would continue for weeks on end until he sucked down that next cocktail. I witnessed the "next cocktail" when we were still on the road in Charlottesville, WV. Or was that Charleston? Anyway, it was one of those "Ch" towns that I often mix up that are so abundant in the South. What I didn't realize was that the next cocktail would stretch out over a month regardless of where we were. The tremors were gone now, but unfortunately, so was Jack.

We drove through the city streets of Raleigh, and finally made our way to Jack and Janet's apartment, set amidst the woods across the street from a very large mall in North Raleigh. As we drove through the lanes of the apartment complex I thought that it made complete sense that Jack lived in this wooded setting. It reminded me of a place that would be in Vermont, and seeing as Jack was from Vermont, the shoe fit very well. Once we got inside, Jack, Janet and I visited civilly for awhile, and then Janet set off to meet with friends. Jack and I decided to go to the store (this time I drove) and get some provisions. I was all wound up from my day's experience and hungry as hell, so wine and food were in order. Once our mission was accomplished, we returned for conversation and hockey viewing. Nothing like a little hockey to let off some steam. I kid you not.

The following three days involved me driving Jack around the town in search of food, booze and an opportunity to leave the house. Jack would inevitably reach the belligerent, drooling stage, once again, and often would become somewhat of a petulant child. This was most often when he started drinking vodka. He would quickly down several shots of vodka, which inevitably lead to us being asked to leave the bar. So be it. We would leave the bar, I would bring Jack home to pass out, and then I would carry on with my evening somewhere else. Jack was safe at home, and I was determined to have some fun on my "vacation", so fun I did have.

During these three days, we didn't see hide nor hair of Janet. Jack would receive the occasional text or even a phone call, but to home she did not return. One day when I was out and about, Jack and she had a conversation which I sensed would be coming about. I'm not sure how I sensed it, but I guess you could chalk it up to a woman's intuition - or something along those lines. I sensed that Janet was going to ask me to not stay at their house anymore. What I didn't sense is her reasoning behind it. She basically accused me of being his enabler and driving him to drink. I, in essence, and in her eyes, was causing a fifty-four year old man to suddenly be an alcoholic? Dubious. The fact that she was omitting was that she would drink with him on a daily basis, but clearly, that was "different". So be it. Clearly I was a threat to her, so off I went to a hotel very close to the downtown area of Raleigh where I stayed for three days. I had things to do and plans to make.

During this time, I started going out and about to some of the places that my friend "Alex" had recommended. That's when I started meeting people in Raleigh, with whom most of I am still acquainted. I actually had the time of my life during these three days, met some really great people, and started thinking that maybe I should live in Raleigh. I believe it was my first fateful evening at Slim's that these seeds were planted. Yes, the very same Slim's, and I know exactly who planted these seeds.

Suddenly, one afternoon I got a call from Jack. He suggested that we get together for lunch (i.e. a drink) and he also informed me that Janet hadn't been home for three days. He wasn't even sure if she was coming back. Ah, more drama. Must it follow me everywhere? I met with him, and he apologized for all of the events involving Miss Janet. To me it was like water off a duck's back. Jack was my friend regardless of the situation, and I knew it wasn't him, it was her. Well, that's not entirely true, but...He suggested that I shouldn't be spending money on a hotel, and that I was more than welcome to stay at his house again. I wasn't at the point of desperation, but I was running out of money and needed to figure out what my next steps were. Would I be staying in Raleigh, or would life take me elsewhere?

With much trepidation, I once again took Jack up on his offer to stay at his house. What I didn't realize was that Janet would actually be returning that evening. Jack once again reached his usual drunken state and fired off some text message informing her that I was back at the house. My initial apprehension had been validated, and ever so quickly. Jack ended up on the phone, and suggested that I use his car to get something to eat. I did as such, and as I was returning, I received a call on my cell phone from an unfamiliar North Carolina number. I called the number back after listening to the message. It was Janet. She informed me that she had called the police and reported Jack's car as being stolen! If I didn't return it in ten minutes she was going to call the police again and have me arrested. She also informed me that all of my stuff would be on the front porch waiting for me. Whoa! Really? I very calmly pulled over to the side of the road (ironically in front of a police station) and just started laughing and shaking my head in disbelief. I pulled my thoughts together and made way back to my stuff and an extremely drunk and apologetic Jack.

I collected my belongings and made my way to the Velvet Cloak where I stayed for a week. I actually really enjoyed my stay there, and had some really great experiences while I was still on my "vacation". I eventually had the epiphany that I did want to live in Raleigh, and had the good fortune to meet my current roommate through a mutual friend. That, and I've become friends with some really amazing people.

Where is Jack? Shortly after all of this happened, Jack went to Ohio to his ex-wife's house to "clean up". And clean up he did. He's now back in Vermont and doing quite well as the Executive Chef of what sounds like a lovely restaurant somewhere near his home town. He hasn't drank a drop since he's left. As for Janet, shortly after I left Jack's apartment, she disclosed to him that she had been using heroin the whole time that she was living with him and she had plans to go to a recovery program somewhere in Mexico. Ironic? I would say so.

To be continued...